I’ve been kind of stressed out lately, more than usual and honestly dealing with anger hasn’t been so easy for me. I’m the kind of person who likes to be organized and practical, and everything is on a schedule. Having kids threw that completely out the window. It’s easy enough to say “Just go with the flow” but actually dealing with it is a little harder. Sometimes, you just don’t know how to manage anger or frustration as a mom.
Dealing With Anger and Frustration As A Mommy
I lost my cool with my toddler the other night and it really upsets me. I was trying to get her to go to sleep at her bed time and she would not stop wiggling and talking and messing around. I lost my cool and yelled at her. Then I heard her baby sister crying in another room and I completely lost it. I just wasn’t dealing with anger in the right way, and I didn’t know what to do to make it better.
My husband works a lot of nights, so I should be used to doing bedtime by myself. But when I heard the baby crying, I started crying too. Not soft, quiet tears either – I threw a toddler-sized tantrum. Life just sometimes isn’t easy, and as mommies, we are supposed to just keep going. That night, I just needed to cry.
My frustration stems from having expectations of what is going to happen, or planning things to do, that gets derailed when my kids don’t follow my plans. Living in an orderly way with kids is impossible. I adore my children, but sometimes I do just honestly get frustrated when things get tough with them.
I’m ashamed of the way I acted. One of my New Year’s Resolutions is to be more patient with my children. Kids don’t always do what you want them to do. I need to let go of my expectations and “just go with the flow.”
Tips For Dealing With Anger And Frustration As A Mommy
- Count to 10
- Take deep breaths
- Lower your expectations
- Always have a plan B
- Use positive words
- Snuggles help
- Try again later
- Start over
- Know that tomorrow will be better
- Walk away for a minute
- Ask someone to help
You may even want to write these things on a simple dry erase board in your kids rooms to remind yourself that in those tough times, there is still a way for you to be dealing with anger in a better way.
When you lose your cool, know that you’re not alone. You may be disappointed in yourself, but you can use that feeling to motivate you to follow these tips and do better next time. I know I will. When it comes to learning about better tools for dealing with anger and frustration in your life, as a wife, employee or in this case, a mom, there are tons of great resources out there. We love the simple ideas listed above, but there are more out there.
As a new mom, you may also feel some stress and frustration from post partum hormones. This can take up to two years to settle, so if you find that these tips are still not helping our anger and frustration, don’t hesitate to seek professional help for depression and anxiety issues that a counselor may be needed to help you overcome.
If you can relate, or have other tips you’ve used, let me know on Twitter.