Butterflies In The Stomach: First Love

No matter the season or the place, love is always in the air, everywhere. In spring, “in love” males and females find each other in birds, mammals and other animal species, after the hearts of the animal ladies have been conquered by fighting or strutting.

We humans also prefer to sit under the sun in pairs rather than alone. In winter, we like to snuggle together under the covers to keep each other warm. Occasions like Christmas or Easter bring us closer together and provide an opportunity to introduce our own parents to our new treasure.

How does it feel to be in love? What should you know when you are in a love relationship for the first time? Why do people actually fall in love with each other? We would like to answer this and more.

Your Body Tingles. Why Is That?

When you feel attracted to a person in a very special way, your body tingles in a funny way. You feel excited, your heart beats faster. It is clear: you have fallen in love. We humans often feel love. But we can’t really understand these feelings. That’s why scientists have tried to find out more about love. This section tells more about what they have found out.

Infatuation Is Stress

When you look at the body’s reaction to being in love, you come to an interesting conclusion: being in love causes a stress response in humans.

The sudden release of hormones causes one to feel a “fluttering” in the stomach, because the stomach is virtually out of control. Soft knees or nausea are a typical sign that you are head over heels in love.

Then it is as if you lose the ground under your feet. Some people can no longer think clearly or constantly feel a tingling in the stomach.

The stress hormone adrenaline puts the body under tension and keeps us awake at night when we think dreamily of our big crush.

This positive stress is easy to endure, unlike the stress we get when we have a paper due.

The stress reactions we feel when we fall in love are currently the only way to measure love scientifically. That’s because it makes itself felt throughout the body – whether you want it to or not.

Fear, Excitement And Caution

If you want to approach the object of your desire, sometimes you are at a loss for words. This is because, on the one hand, you are under stress. On the other hand, this new situation puts you on alert.

Similar to an oral exam, you can get really nervous. Maybe you even suddenly forget what you wanted to say. Then you act really stupid and get scared. You don’t want to be rejected and you’re terrified of being rejected. Besides, it could be that you are laughed at or teased. Because showing feelings is not an easy thing to do.

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You reveal a part of yourself that is quite vulnerable. This is something you do only rarely – a confession of love is not something you do every day. So it’s no wonder that when you’re a teenager, you’re quite unpracticed in this matter.

It’s okay to be cautious. But too much shyness can have a detrimental effect over time. After all, if you don’t make a sound, you often don’t get noticed.

Sometimes it’s better to take heart and muster up all the courage you can. Then it’s easier to approach the new crush.

Does Love Have A Meaning?

Love is a mysterious thing. Sometimes we don’t understand it at all. Especially when a loved one does something we can’t comprehend.

But why do we actually love? What is the meaning of it?

Love has not only existed since yesterday. It is as old as man himself. It has always been “programmed” into us and is, therefore, one of the most human feelings of all. In the course of human development, we have even learned how to intuitively find the right partner. If you do something intuitively, you don’t need to think about it. You just know how to do it because it’s part of being human.

People in love are actually very “hormone-driven.” This may sound unromantic, but it is the truth. Because the feelings themselves are a chemical process in the body. If a boy or girl matches your subconscious ideas of the ideal partner, then the hormones really kick into gear. So love begins in the brain. Messenger substances in this organ then decide whether we like someone or not.

Did you know that there is even a so-called relationship hormone? Oxytocin is responsible for making people want to commit to a partner. This hormone has a great influence on whether a couple stays together for a long time. This is because it controls feelings such as loyalty in people.

But now we would like to return to the question of meaning. Because love has the meaning that we reproduce as human beings, it is something so significant for us. All living beings have made it their primary goal to produce offspring that will pass on their genes. That is why the issue of love forms a central point in the life of every human being. Everyone wants to find a partner with whom they can cuddle, make out and more. If one is old enough, the relationship results in a child that combines the characteristics of both parents.

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Infatuation Or Love?

Almost everyone is in love with another person at least once during their life. Depending on what we like, we feel attracted to very different stimuli. It can be the way a person laughs, talks, or gives himself or herself overall that triggers the tingle in your stomach. Maybe you like your new crush’s face so much that the sight of him or her always makes you grin.

If you are made to laugh, feel on the same level with someone mentally, or are similar in some way, then love can develop. However, this first love is different from the love between an old married couple. It makes a difference whether you are freshly in love or have loved each other with all your heart for a longer time. If you are together for a longer time, the relationship must also survive difficult times. And this is where infatuation and love differ.

While you can fall in love with someone quite quickly, even though you don’t know him or her very well yet, it’s a little different with love. If you get serious about a relationship, you might move in together at some point. Then it may be that you argue from time to time or get on each other’s nerves. Especially the first time after the move is sometimes quite stressful. This puts the relationship to the test. But if you love each other, you put up with that. This raises a question. What exactly are the different levels of love?

To Like Someone Well

Well, if you can like someone, then that hardly has anything to do with love. With it one means merely that one finds someone Okay. Whether one spends now gladly time together, is not yet said with it. In any case, you can have a good time with people you like. They are a little like you. That’s why you find them okay.

Like Someone

When you like someone, you appreciate their presence. “I like you!” does not mean that you are in love. Because friends or siblings also like each other (or not). If you like someone, then you meet with each other more often to share hobbies or tell each other the very latest.

You do a favor for someone you like from time to time. If he or she needs help, you are willing to make yourself available.

Friendship, however, always depends on mutual give and take. Both must value and like each other if the friendship is to last in the long run.

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Like Someone

Do you like someone? Then maybe you miss him or her even when you’re apart. You wish that this person is doing well and that you will be friends with him or her for a long time. If you haven’t seen each other for a long time, then the anticipation of a meeting is great. This person is good for you. You are happy to have her by your side.

Friends can like each other. Sometimes a first, small infatuation develops from it with the time.

To Be Fond Of Someone

Remarks like “I love you!” don’t always have anything to do with love either. Girls in particular like to say this to their friends. When people text each other, they often write HDL at the end. It doesn’t mean that you are in love with that person.

Most kids love their parents and grandparents. Of course, the same is true the other way around.

Being In Love, Infatuated, Smitten With Someone

Some people think that there is a difference between having a crush and being in love. At the end of the day, however, these things are quite similar.

When you are in love with someone, you want to be with that person all the time. It makes you feel all tingly and weird when you see him or her. Shy kids don’t even dare to approach their crush directly. Some start to stutter or blush.

Jealousy also shows infatuation or love. One does not want to lose the other. That’s why you want to be the only one for the other person. A little bit of jealousy is normal and is in each of us by nature. However, you must not overdo it.

You can be happy or unhappy in love. If the other person returns the love, because he is also in love, then it can be that you “go together”. Then one is happily in love. Holding hands, little kisses and more also show the other that you belong together.

It is different when you are unhappily in love. Then you have the feeling that you absolutely want to be with someone, although he or she sees it quite differently. Maybe he or she is already with someone else. This situation can be quite unpleasant for the person in love. However, tears, pain and sadness usually do not last too long. Because sooner or later you fall in love with someone else and love has a new chance to grow and flourish.

Because you can fall in love quite quickly, being in love in itself does not have as much significance as a longer lasting love. However, the phase of falling in love for the first time is something wonderful that a newly in love couple should definitely savor.

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Loving Someone

Couples who are already together eventually love each other. Love is a more intense thing than being in love. Still, many teenagers say “I love you.” when they really mean “I love you.” This is probably because they want to prove to themselves that their relationship is something that will last forever. Also, it’s not easy at first to distinguish between being fond and being in love. Only after the first relationship has fallen apart do people become more careful about the way they express their love.

How do you know that you love someone? The best way to describe the feeling is that love also has something to do with renunciation. When you love someone, you sometimes do something for love that means renunciation for yourself. You want the other person to be well. You would give almost anything for that. That is why love is a very selfless thing.

Love also means being faithful to each other and being honest with each other. If you just take advantage of someone and secretly cheat with another person, then that is selfishness but not love.

The longer you are together, the more the infatuation turns into love. You have already gotten used to each other a little and don’t want anything to change. You value the other person and want them to always be a part of your life.

It may be that you don’t smooch as much or have sex with each other a little less often than you did at the beginning. Nevertheless, you mean a lot to each other. The bond between two lovers is difficult to describe. That’s why everyone has to experience for themselves how it feels.

When a love ends, it is usually more serious than when you fall in love. You have been together for a long time, perhaps share an apartment or even have children together. The loss of all these things is correspondingly bad when you are abandoned or have to leave someone after a long time.

Worksheet For The Text

1) What does the word intuitive mean? Explain it briefly using the text.

2) What happens in the human body when you fall in love? How do you feel that you are in love?

3) Have you ever been in love? What was it like for you? Write an essay about your first, own love story. If you have never been in love, think about what it might have been like. Make up a story about your first love.

Photo: Ammentorp / bigstockphoto.com

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